THREE HOLY MEN & THREE BEARS

A Catholic Priest, a Baptist Preacher and a Rabbi all served as Chaplains to the students of the University of Maine .

 

They would get together two or three times a week for coffee and to talk shop. 

 

One day, someone made the comment that preaching to people isn't really all that hard, a real challenge would be to preach to a bear. 

 

One thing led to another, and they decided to do an experiment. They would all go out into the woods, find a bear, preach to it, and attempt to convert it to their religion.  

 

Seven days later, they all came together to discuss their experiences. 

 

Father Flannery, who had his arm in a sling, was on crutches, and had various bandages on his body and limbs, went first. 

 

'Well,' he said, 'I went into the woods to find me a bear. And when I found him, I began to read to him from the Catechism. 

 

Well, that bear wanted nothing to do with me and began to slap me around. So I quickly grabbed my holy water, sprinkled him and, 

 

Holy Mary Mother of God, he became as gentle as a lamb. The Bishop is coming out next week to give him first communion and confirmation.'  

 

Reverend Billy Bob the Baptist, spoke next. He was in a wheelchair, had one arm and both legs in casts, and had an IV drip. 

 

In his best fire-and-brimstone oratory, he exclaimed, 'Well, brothers, you KNOW that we Baptists don't sprinkle! 

 

I went out and I found me a bear, and then I began to read to my bear from God's Holy Word! But that bear wanted nothing to do with me. 

 

So I took hold of him and we began to wrestle. We wrestled down one hill, up another and down another until we came to a creek. 

 

So I quickly dunked him and baptized his hairy soul. And just like you said, he became as gentle as a lamb. 

 

We spent the rest of the day praising Jesus. Hallelujah! 

 

The Priest and the Reverend both looked down at the Rabbi, who was lying in a hospital bed. 

 

He was in a body cast and traction with IVs and monitors running in and out of him.  He was in really bad shape. 

 

 

 

The Rabbi looked up and said: "Looking back on it, circumcision may not have been the best way to start."

 

Thanks Ralph